When Wildlife Goes Bad

Yesterday was an entertaining day.

When me and PM arrived home last night, I noticed a squirrel cowering under our doorstep. We tried not to scare it but it didn't move even after we went into the house although it was definitely alive.

Now me be the soppy person that I am decided to take some nut cereal down to it hoping that if it was fed it might be ok. PM in the mean time rang the RSPCA. I put the cereal on a plate and took it downstairs. The squirrel was now between the wall and the paper bin just to the side of the door. I put the food down and thinking that squirrel were cute and cuddly as I remember them from Danson Park and at my nan's I held a nut thinking it would take it and eat it.

And this is when my dreams of squirrels being cute and cuddly was shattered and I realised they were nothing more than a tree rat! It went a bit mad and started jumping around and making weird noises. I dropped the nut and shut the door. I then realised I had left the plate downstairs.

5 minutes later I went down to check on it and it was eating the food I had left. The RSPCA told us to ring back in the morning if it was still there. When I went down again about 15 minutes later it was still eating but started jumping again when I opened the door so I shut it again and decided to leave it until I left for Yoga (just going off on a tangent slightly - its really easy for me to get to Bromley! It only takes half an hour).

I got PM to come down and protect me if the squirrel was going mad still when I left but it wasn't there. We took the plate back upstairs and bleached it and then went back downstairs. We noticed the squirrel was not behind the paper bin hiding. I didn't really want to look over the wall and see if it was ok as I remembered when I was at Uni and one of the rugby players in our halls went over to investigate the rustling in the bin at the entrance to halls and a squirrel jumped out at him. I didn't really want it to jump at me so I decided to leave it.

When I returned around half 10, I had a quick peek to see if it was still there and I could just about make out a silhouette of a tail so I decided to leave it. I realised that it was more than likely dead at this point as I'm sure it would have taken off by now.

PM told me this morning over breakfast that the local cats were sniffing around last night and he went down and thought the squirrel was probably dead and having looked at it on the way to work this morning I think this is pretty much confirmed now. Its a shame. And it is also the second dead squirrel we have seen in a week of living where we are. I am wondering if someone is poisoning them.

So if it is still there tonight I will have the not so fun task of putting the poor thing in a few bags and chucking him in the wheelie bin. Not the most dignified of burials but its what the RSPCA said to do if it was dead in the morning. Mind you the wheelie bin must be better than becoming local cat food.


  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  2. I didn't know it had gone crazy!

    Poor thing was probably scared to death of you. Mind you, when I wake up in the morning and see you it... [snip! better stop before I don't wake up tomorrow morning...]

  3. Anonymous10:06 pm

    Are you sure you didnt poison it? What nuts did you give it maybe it had a nut allergy .... and you killed it!!

  4. I think the fact that it didn't run away in the first place is reason enough to believe that it wasn't in the best of health. I gave it cereal with nuts in. The RSPCA said it was likely it would be dead by morning sadly. At least he had a decent last meal!

  5. Anonymous7:15 pm

    Yeah the nut allergy probably sped up the process.

  6. Anonymous11:01 pm

    in my considered opinion the squirrel did indeed die as a result of nut poisoning. as we know the grey squirrel hails from North America and it's metabolism is used to nuts which can be found in temporate zones. Providing a nut based cereal would have inevitably involved use of nuts from a tropical zone which would have triggered an intolerant reaction leading to a slow and agonising death. i would not consider this murder but instead a well meaning gesture which had tragic consequences for the poor squirrel. do not blame yourself my child.

    Prof H.V.Ratzenbaum RTZ.DSQ.RFS.
    Squirology Dept.
    University of North Carolina

  7. Anonymous11:14 pm


    I have been following this story with great interest and sorrow at the death of a poor squirrel. I work for the protection and preservation of the great squirrel race. In certain areas of outer mongolia and close teritories it has become a criminal offence to even look at squirrels with malice, let alone poison them. Luckily these laws do not apply in the UK except in some councils of Newcastle of Bognor Regis. I would consider you taking a look at your local council's policies and laws on squirell offences and laws surrounding the treatment of squirrels. I have posted your website to my head of squirrel abuse, UK, and Channel Islands, Mr Bushey who is obliged to inform local authorities of illegal conduct and mal - treatment to squirrels.



  8. Anonymous11:20 pm

    Steve thankyou for your contribution to this critical debate. it is well known that squirrel squinting is a criminal offence in some parts of the world but i doubt that any such laws apply in Peckham where this particular squirrel killer comes from. i think we need to simply hope that lessons have been learned and no further attrocities will be committed in future. remember what happened to the Guatamalan red after all!!!

  9. Anonymous11:47 am

    so there you are Heinrich Von Ratzenbaum

  10. Anonymous11:48 am

    mildred!! how did you find me

  11. Anonymous11:50 am

    same way as i always do. i knew i would find you lurking around some young lady's weblog pretending to be some world expert on something or other. come away you old goat!!

  12. Anonymous11:50 am

    aw shucks Mildred you are so unfair

  13. Anonymous9:58 pm

    I do feel bad for the squirrel, but it's not your fault it was doomed to live an urban existence. What I'm really interested in is... where in Bromley you do your yoga?! I'm due to move there (from sunny streatham, incidentally) pretty soon and am really going to miss my friendly neighbourhood yogis...

  14. I go to Holmes Place for yoga. They have a very good fitness programme there. Where in streatham have you been doing yoga?


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